Addicted to Your Thoughts: You CAN Quit the Habit
by Ane Axford on December 28, 2009
I wrote a post about insomnia as it relates to HSPs and how it is different than the “typical” diagnosis of insomnia.
Well, one of the things that keeps HSPs up at night is an addiction to their thoughts. This addiction also keeps you from your ideal calling, or career, which I have been posting about lately and will continue to post about.
Yes, this is literally an addiction. Those chemicals in your body give you a buzz and a high when you think about things over and over, planning and organizing.
In just the same way that any addiction begins, thinking becomes a coping skill that fills a need. Our sensitivity allows us to be constantly absorbing information from the day we’re born, or even before–in the womb. We can be called emotional or energetic sponges. We take all this in to the point that we miss who we are in the process. We get so used to FIGURING OUT everything because we aren’t even in touch with our own natural way of being. This is our sensitivity at work, helping us to survive by being extremely useful to the tribe we are born into.
Now, as adults, we are past that critical surviving through childhood period and we are still alive (that’s sort of a given if you are reading this). So, now we are realizing that “Hey, this isn’t doing it for me anymore.” Yet, we are so used to coping by figuring out who to be before going into a party–so we can come across as “normal” or “acceptable”, planning ahead every step to make sure all our sensitive needs will be met, finding a way to make sure others in power will meet our needs because we can’t do it on our own, in sum–figuring out how to fit in. The reason we have to figure it out is because WE DON’T FIT IN.
And, that’s just right. We were never meant to fit in. If we did, all these great new inventions that didn’t exist previously wouldn’t be here. There would be no new music, art, ideas.
We become addicted to planning and thinking as a means to avoid feeling because we may have learned that our feelings are: too much, they are bad, they make others uncomfortable, they are unsolvable, if we go into them we may never come out, and the biggest–WE FEEL THAT WE ARE BROKEN AND WE MUST FIX OURSELVES. We think that if we think long enough and hard enough, eventually we’ll find a solution to what’s wrong with us. We think that one day we will figure it out, how to be like everyone else. We will figure out how to resolve all our uncomfortable feelings, all our sensitivities to food and light and sound, our relationship differences…all of it. We all want to feel wanted, loved, and accepted. And, we think we can figure out how to do that.
I’m going to give you a BIG tip right now. STOP IT.